Now, as a mom, and especially as a new mom, you receive all sorts of comments from people -those congratulating you, those wishing you well, those bringing you gifts and celebrating the birth of your newborn with you. People who basically make you feel so much better, especially for first time moms for who, those first few days and weeks can be tough -when you are so vulnerable and don’t know what you are or are not supposed to be doing and you keep second guessing yourself.
But then, there is this category of people who somewhat, with their comments make you feel so much worse and so doubtful of yourself than you already are. You know, those ones who tell you:
- “The baby kept you up all night? Woiye.” And then they put this really sad face that makes you want to comfort them.
- “Your eyes are so red, woiye you haven’t slept? Gosh and you also look so tired. You poor thing.” And then they proceed to hold their head in their hands.
- “Your nipples are cracked and your boobs sore? Woiye that’s so sad.” And then they’re shaking their head from side to side.
- “Baby has not pooped in four days? Woiye now what will you do?” And they have this ghastly look on their face that makes you start panicking.
- “Ati nowadays you don’t had time to do your nails or make your hair? As in baby takes that much of your time?” And they actually look very shocked about it. Like duh!
I’m not saying such friends or relatives mean bad when they ask these questions. Not at all. Infact, most of them mean well. HOWEVER, they are full of so much pity for you, every single sentence they speak to you is so pityful, accompanied by a pity face. Even when they send you an SMS, they are sure to put a sad emoticon at the end:(.
I mean, how sorry can your situation be surely? It’s as though it’s so catastrophic, until you even start doubting yourself and thinking that it just might be.
Being a new mom is tough, and so you need all the support and encouragement you can get, not someone who is going to feel so much pity on you and your new baby, that you just want to cry. It can really drain you mentally and emotionally.
Did you encounter such people when you were a new mum? See also: 10 Things Not to Say to a New Mum